In Loving Memory of Gran'pop

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I've neglected B&L's blog for over a month now as I've known that the next entry needed to be one about Gran'pop, who died an unexpected and untimely death on February 19th. Nama/Mom had been with me and kids the third week of February as Ken was traveling internationally for work. That Thursday I drove Mom to the train station for a 1:00 train back to Washington, and I spoke to Dad briefly when I got home, telling him that Mom's train would arrive at Union Station around 3:00, and that she'd be at the Grosvenor Metro station around 4. So Dad picked Mom up then, and around 5:00 he had a fatal heart attack.

All of us are so very thankful that Mom was home when Dad suffered his heart attack, and that it didn't happen as he was driving Mom home from the Metro. Mom was with Dad when he started coughing and having trouble breathing, and they were able to tell each other that they loved each other as they waited for the paramedics. The paramedics tried to revive Dad, and he was eventually taken to Suburban Hospital in Bethesda, but Mom believes that he had passed away the minute the ambulance got to the house.

Dad's death is still so new and raw, but we take comfort in the fact that he went quickly and that the love of his life was by his side. Mom orchestrated a lovely service for him at St. Raphael's Catholic Church in Rockville, followed by a tea at Normandy Farms where guests shared some of their memories of Dad. A private burial was held in Barnesville, PA, where Dad spent his early childhood and where his mother is buried.

I'm pasting below the obituary that appeared in The Potomac Almanac -- a shorter version was printed in The Washington Post -- as well as a letter that was included on the back page of the funeral service's program.

A week and a half after the funeral I went home for the weekend, and Mom is doing beautifully given the circumstances. I was so impressed by how much she had accomplished in terms of all the calls she had initiated with respect to social security, car titles, insurance policies, etc. To my great comfort, neighbors and friends are continuing --even now, a month after the fact -- to reach out, to stop by unannounced, to invite her over for dinner, to invite her to various outings, and Mom's taking advantage of all of the offers. Her new puppy, Nick, is keeping her busy, too, as he seems to be a slow learner when it comes to his house training! Mom will spend Easter weekend with us, including Easter Sunday at Aunt Jeannie's where my cousins and their children will gather for an egg hunt in Jeannie's big yard, and Mom has reservations to visit David, Lori and Sara at the end of April. Then I'm planning to take Bryn down in May for a trip to the Bureau of Printing and Engraving.

Coincidentally, our next-door neighbor, Marshall Maran, lost his father unexpectedly last week to a backwards fall down a set of stairs in his own home. My heart goes out to Marshall, and from the two friends who brought over dinner in the week that Dad died and from the few bouquets of flowers that we received, I now know how important it is to reach out to those who are experiencing the loss of a loved one. For the Marans we've taken over a couple of home-cooked meals, and we watched their four-year-old daughter, Emily, today for three hours while her parents were at a service for Marshall's Dad. As it turns out, watching Emily wasn't an imposition at all -- she and Bryn played by themselves beautifully and were practically invisible to me and Ken. What a different world we are approaching as Bryn will soon by going on "drop-off" playdates where she and her friends will need little to no supervision from parents.

And on that note, I'll resume the blog dedicated to Bryn and Luke in my next entry.

Obituary
John F. Shumanis, 67, a 25-year resident of Potomac, MD, died February 19th of a sudden coronary at Suburban Hospital. Born eight weeks early on November 17, 1941, in Pottsville, PA, he graduated at the top of his class from Northeast Catholic High School for Boys in Philadelphia and was the first in his family to earn a college degree ? a B.S. in electrical engineering from the University of Pennsylvania in 1963. Upon graduation, John worked for two years as an electrical engineer for DuPont in Parkersburg, WV. He then began a long and distinguished sales and management career with IBM, initially selling IBM?s revolutionary electric typewriters and eventually the first personal computers. Working at the forefront of the computer revolution, John continually made IBM?s 100% Club for meeting his quota for the year and was twice awarded IBM?s Golden Circle award for the company?s top 1 percent of sales personnel worldwide. John was transferred to the Washington area in 1984, and he retired as the branch manager of a former Washington, DC, office in 1991.

In his retirement John pursued his interests in flying, computer gaming, and cycling, and he taught himself how to play the piano. He enjoyed teaching English as a second language at Berlitz, and he also volunteered his time by providing reading support at Bells Mill Elementary School in Potomac. John was a member of St. Raphael?s Catholic Church in Rockville.

John will be remembered for his intelligence and sense of humor ? even his four-year-old granddaughter, upon hearing the news of his death, remarked, ?Gran?pop was funny? ? as well as for his devotion to his wife of 42 years, Charrel Shumanis. John and Charrel had renewed their wedding vows in 2000 and recently celebrated 40 years of marriage in Italy. In addition to his wife, John is survived by his sister, Vivian McCann of Philadelphia; a beloved aunt, Virginia Sisak of Barnesville, PA; two children ? David Shumanis of Ft. Lauderdale, FL, and Nichole Shumanis Rowles of Wynnewood, PA; and three young grandchildren.

A wake, immediately followed by the funeral, will be held on Tuesday, February 24th at St. Raphael?s Catholic Church, 1513 Dunster Road in Rockville.

In lieu of flowers, memorial contributions may be made to the American Heart Association [http://www.americanheart.org or 1-800-AHA-USA1.]

Letter to Dad
Dear Dad,
I remember playing cards with you. And backgammon, too. I remember your coming to a field day sponsored by my elementary school when I won a blue ribbon in the 50-yard dash. There were very few Dads there, but you were there in your pressed suit. I remember spending hours playing Foosball when we lived in Charleston. I remember thinking how cool you were when you brought home an Atari play station because you were interested in playing, too -- and not because it was Christmas or someone's birthday. I remember you always brought back great presents whenever you traveled for work, which, luckily wasn't that often. I remember your patience as you helped me with my physics homework in high school, and I remember being so impressed that you knew how to solve all the challenging problems considering how far removed you were at the time from your engineering training. I remember your telling me that if I were to get accepted to an Ivy League-caliber school, you'd "find a way" to send me there. And so, unsaddled by student loans, I followed in your footsteps at Penn where I met the love of my life. I remember how choked up you were at the airport when I was leaving for a year in Japan. I remember receiving an artist's smock in the mail from you when I mentioned that I was auditing an art class while in graduate school. I remember dancing with you at my wedding. I remember how much you loved Mom, and the lengths you went to to throw her a lovely surprise party for her 65th birthday. I remember your playing bingo with Bryn -- and being visibly disappointed when you were defeated by a four-year-old. Now that I'm a parent, too, I have a much better appreciation for all that you did for me, and I'm forever grateful. I remember talking to you on the phone briefly on Thursday, telling you that Mom was on her way back to DC. And now you're gone, but you will always be in my heart and in my memories. I love you, Dad. Thanks so much for everything. See you again. Hugs and kisses, Nichole